Going Back

You could call it an obsession with the self. You might even attribute it to the time I always seem to have to procrastinate, to ponder, to introspect. But I like to go back to my old posts and read them again. There's nothing special about today. And by special I solely meant occurrences like completion of a certain number of years or posts. I just feel like writing about my blog.

My main motivation behind it was to hold on. Hold on to memories and feelings. Hold on to people and events. The most amazing thing about going back is reading the comments. Realizing how you could relate to something that I experienced. How you could sympathize with me when I wrote about my failures. How you could feel nostalgic when I dreamed about my grandfather's place although yours could have been so different. How you would feel the same turmoil inside you, the same urge to break free and the same need to know the answers. And that's the reason this blog has become so much more than just a memoir. The songs I liked, the people I met, the books I loved and the places I visited. It sure started off as a means to capture moments from my life. But with time, it has become a part of what I am today.

And you know it makes my day when I see that comment on a post. I would be a fool to admit that I do not look forward to it. Everybody loves an ego boost, a compliment. And I am no exception. But knowing you, knowing that you meant what you said; that's what makes it so fulfilling.

A few days ago, I was wandering through my blog. Reading some posts, looking at the comments. Laughing to myself and remembering. And at times, there was something new to be found among the old posts. To the few who read this blog..... thank you. You make me want to write.